Sunday, June 25, 2017

Hopeful Adventures Indeed

So today I've been married six years.  It seems like a blink and forever all at once.  It's funny... my Prince Charming wasn't at all what I dreamed of as a little girl.  He was older, already had children, didn't have a lifelong career, and in general was poor as a church mouse.  But he was funny, and kind, and doting, and worked so hard.  You see I'd dated the perfect boy on paper sometime before I met Mark.  All the boxes checked and I thought that equaled happily ever after, but my heart just couldn't buy in. It turns out that Prince Charming had to be someone that could make me laugh all the time, and make me feel like I was the only girl in the room, and actually listen when I talk.  He wasn't perfect.  We've had one and only one REALLY serious fight and it was before we got married and he will tell you it was his fault (and it TOTALLY was, but I might have contributed slightly in my own roundabout way.) That one fight taught us the one most important lesson ever in relationship land.  You have to communicate.  That's more than talking people it's being honest. We communicate pretty well and that's helpful. And the other end of being honest is listening.  Mark listens.  Sometimes he's listening with blue headphones while I'm yelling with a pink microphone so there are translation issues as those don't compute, but he listens all the same.  And every once in awhile he REALLY surprises me at the little things he picks up. On Friday, before our anniversary date he presented me with a pendant.  Now here's the deal people. I'm a teacher so you know what kind of money I make.  My husband is a computer tech and he makes a good living but we live a good life understanding that things like trips to Tahiti and Europe are out of reach for us and may always be so because of the careers we've chosen.  (Shoot a trip to Disney World is out of reach. Seriously, how do some of you go so much??? I priced that out for this summer for our big birthdays and I was like, "How many thousands did you say????" Great googly moogly!) But, we LOVE our jobs which is priceless.  We are happy.  We see the ocean every year, and for a kid who took exactly two vacations involving overnights that weren't at family homes her entire young life, that's a pretty good deal!  We pay our bills responsibly. (Well mostly responsibly.  Sorry Dave Ramsey.  I love you but I'm going to the dang beach once a year whether that debt snowball is rolling as fast as I'd like it to or not!)  But I digress.  What does all this have to do with anything?   Well you see, for a LOOOOOONG time now I've dreamed of having real actual pearls.  Like legit out of an oyster pearls.  I got addicted to watching those pearl parties on facebook because I love seeing the pretty colors they find.  Pearls are not on the debt snowball list.  Mark has listened.  He heard my very selfish little dream and he listened.  He knows how badly I want to pay our debt off and how hard I'm working to do it.  He knows I would never buy some things for myself.  He's also figured out that going way overboard with like a double strand of pearls would've gotten him killed.   So on our anniversary he handed me a small box and in it was this pendant with one perfect pearl.  Not extravagant or overdone but simple and lovely and just enough.  Not pretentious, not showy, but a little reminder to really appreciate life and living it.  After all, that pearl took that poor oyster a lot of work and time to make. That pendant is like a metaphor for us and I wouldn't trade that for anything. Thank you Mark for listening.  I love you and I couldn't have asked for a better Prince Charming for myself.  Not perfect, but perfect for me.  So for those of you still looking find someone who you can talk to and who listens.  That is the recipe for happiness no matter what because you both feel honored and appreciated.  You feel valued and that is what we all truly want. 

And so ends this extra sappy blog post.  :)